Question: “How Do You Overcome Desires & Attachment When Enlightened?”
By Sanjib Mukherjee
Question: If your only goal in life was to be at one with the divine, and it becomes fulfilled, how do you continue living life with no desires? In your sansar you still have to take action but it doesn’t matter what you do as there is no right or wrong outcome to it, so what action do you take? If you have kids and a husband, but no attachment, how do you go on?
Sanjib: Thank you for such a beautiful and honest question. It’s a question which I myself first had around seven years ago. No matter how many people I asked, no one was able to quench my thirst for the answers I was seeking. During this time, I was reading the entire epic “Mahabharata” (which took around 6 months to get through!), when mid-way through, I started relating my question to how Krishna had always led his life on earth. I then started thinking about all the enlightened masters who have graced this earth: Jesus, Buddha, Rama etc, and how each of their life stories could help me with my question. The answers I found back then are what I would like to share with you now.
Becoming enlightened is not a question of removing desires or removing attachment, it’s a state of going beyond these worldly facets. Krishna on the battlefield, was immensely attached and in love with all those who both loved and hated him. During the great Kuru war, he had helped kill so many noble warriors and good-hearted souls in the name of dharma (righteousness), yet he still remained composed and centred throughout the entire episode. Jesus was whipped, tortured and humiliated by so many of his perpetrators, yet he still never lost an ounce of love for them all. Buddha had to suffer so many hardships throughout his life, yet he never moved from his inner happiness.
Despite their trials and tribulations, each of these and every other enlightened master remained relentlessly active throughout their lives; fulfilling so many of their life goals with the utmost dedication, discipline and sincerity. The reason I believe they were able to do so, is because they were all aware of the true nature of the “self”, and how, ultimately, we are all connected to one another. Does your left arm ever feel envious or jealousy of your right arm? Do your ears ever get jealous of your eyes because they can see? Of course not, the idea is absurd as we identify ourselves with our entire body. We see our whole body as one; where the sum of all our parts (eyes, hands, feet, legs etc), make us up as a whole.
In the same manner, an enlightened master sees the whole world as their own, and an intrinsic part of their very being. When the world becomes an extension of yourself, where is the scope to feel attachment? Where is the need to fulfil any desires? If everything belongs to you; every being, every thought, every emotion, every particle, then why feel the need to gain something when you already own it. Taking this grand attitude is how I believe enlightenment takes you beyond any concepts in your mind and sets you free.
Your question asked about knowing what are the right steps to take in life when fully enlightened, and how to remove family attachment. In reality, an enlightened master doesn’t need to take any action whatsoever. However, they do so out of love and compassion for fellow mankind. When you reach an awareness of your true infinite nature, how could you not work tirelessly to make this world a better place? In helping “others,” who are you really helping?
The question you posed is an extremely precious and beautiful one; do not be in a hurry to find the answers. This very question will take you much deeper within your spiritual growth, where you will find so many hidden secrets lying dormant within. The nature of this article is merely to get you thinking, and give you some of my ideas as a starting point for making your own conclusions. I hope the above helps in your quest for the truth.
Love & Blessings,
Sanjib
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This article says that if u own everything you are the goal…….but what do you mean by everything? Please tell me…
Dear Naman
When the droplet becomes the ocean where is the need to be a drop.
When you possess diamonds, where is the need to posess aritificial stones?
Once you are enlightened this question will never arise. I am nearing there with my guru’s grace and I see desires dropping naturally like ripe fruits from a tree. If a desire is dropped prematurely there will be resistance so don’t try.
Now the work just seems to flow. It is like an ever new joy. Every action is performed like enjoying a game. This is what is meant by the word “LEELA” as we have heard so much in our ancient scriptures.
My thoughts and my full explanation of this might make a whole book but I will leave at this for now. However will be happy to share if anyone wishes to know more.
Vijyalaxmi
I guess I am not looking to be totally free of desire–just the attachment to them. If I see icecream, I devour it, and enjoy completely. No icecream? I enjoy myself completely as well. Spirits in bodies, we are human. We only suffer when we are never satisfied with the given moment. To be present to all the wonders and joys..at this moment…
Hi Naman, when I say you are everything…it means you are both the journey and the destination, thus everything you need is already within you…
Vijya…always feel free to share as much as you like, this site is a platform for like minded people to learn from one another..:)
Kathryn…you are absolutely right…spoken beautifully…
No question comes without an answer. Most of the time answers are within us and many a times we need to get answers to our questions from others experiences and wisdom. To really question oneself needs courage and when you can do this rest all should be a cakewalk for you. Go ahead and you will succeed.
Such a nice post Sanjib. Vijyalaxmi, would you care to explain to us more about what you have said. I feel like that too but I cannot explain it. Yet I cannot say how close enlightenment is. You both write very well and we are all keen to know more about this topic of enlightenment. I have seen you are a musician Vijyalaxmi, and what is your profession Sanjib? Regards, Sudhi.
Nice one Sanjib…i feel that if one is truly enlightened then there is no question of desire & attachment…or putting it another way…as long as there is desire & attachment (they r ultimately the same!)….true enlightenment has not happened. Beyond a certain point….there is no need to work against desire…it just recedes, i am told! (from works of Sri Ramakrishna; Nisargadatta Maharaj; Swami Sivananda; Sri Ramana)
But forgive me for asking hasnt god given us his greatest gift by letting us being human and experiencing love???So If I may ask what do u mean by enligightement??and dont our family mean the most to us??coslife without it is pointless
Sudhi thank you for your words, not only do I enjoy writing, but I love reading everybody’s views aswell.
Senthil, you are right..enlightenment is beyond desire and attachment….
Naman, yes family is important to us, with with enlightenment we are talking about the whole world being your family, not just blood relations. Everyone belongs to you, and you belong to everyone:)
Sudhi thanks for your response. Here’s a little more explanation on enlightenment as requested.
We carry a lot of baggages with our thougths and past imprints which are our accumulated karmas. Once we free ourselves of imprints we become free and the process of enlightenment begins. The energies flow freely within our bodies and an experience of bliss happens. When the epsiodes of bliss become common and we become internally stable regardless of our outside situations we are truly on our way. A birth or death will begin to feel the same. You just cannot help but feel happy and energetic most of the time. In such a state how can life feel like a burden? Looking after our families become easy. We develop wisdom and compassion as we move closer to the divine. The more trouble people give us the more challenging and intense the game becomes. Playing a game may be tough but it is always exciting and fun. It is our choice. Most people are unaware that we have chosen to live unconsciouly but if we begin to live consciously we are truly heading for enlightenment.
Many other factors have to be considered such as the ego and unfinished desires. The most painful is the transition period when the ego has to die and you have to face death while living in this body. But I will end here for now unless prompted to write more.
@Naman…I agree and am sure Sanjib does as well… that life is indeed a gift…and to practice & experience kindness is one of the best ways of using it…Many saints had families…Ramakrishna, Nisargadatta, Lahiri Mahasaya are recent examples…from what they say…you don’t have to give up your family in the course of inner enquiry…all you …
I am sorry our views will differ there……because just because absence of proof is not proof of absence so it does not mean that god dose not exist also I will tell you a story now….
A guy goes to a barber and they start talking while the barber cuts his hair and they touch various topics…then the barber says that god dose not exist His side:If god existed would there be so much evil…..so much poverty???Then the client just shuts up to avoid a confrontation.
After the client is done.they go outside and on the bench they see a guy who has got long hair and they ask him do u know a barber exists??The guy says no and then the client turns to the barber and says well you arent supposed to exist!!!So just because you haven’t met him doesn’t know he doesn’t exist…
its true that if we dont see anyone we dont beleive in that, but we are all living beings well aware of the miracles around us. Isn’t there some superpower heading above us, and we all remember him by one name called god? It may be long discussion, but I respect everyone’s views , as we all are almighty’s creation.
Do you ask anything from your children in return for what you have given them? It is your duty to work for them, and there the matter ends. In whatever you do for a particular person, a city, or a state, assume the same attitude towards it as you have towards your children — expect nothing in return. If you can invariably take the position of a giver, in which everything given by you is a free offering to the world, without any thought of return, then will your work bring you no attachment. Attachment comes only where we expect a return.